Who wants a Bite?

Some years ago, gleaning through the newspapers, I had come across a news item that said that any person bitten by a stray dog would be paid compensation by NDMC.  I was immediately reminded of that famous quote in journalism – “when a dog bites a man it is not news……”  The decision to pay compensation would however erode the sanctity of the saying, as it amounts to a man biting a dog.  It would definitely have other ‘uncanny’ fallouts for the canines.

The decision apparently has been made to punish the NDMC, for, the canines fall under its jurisdiction.  However, in reality, it is the stray dogs on whom the real punishment has been inflicted.  Kudos to the NDMC’s ‘dog sense’. 

That the NDMC should pay compensation, made me wonder if ‘once bitten twice shy’ saying would be valid anymore.  After all, in today’s materialistic world, when it comes to earning ‘a few bucks more’, where is the harm in getting bitten?  After all, when the Bollywood damsels don’t get bitten by the pangs of their conscience, or feel shy about exposing, why the hell should an ordinary person feel shy of getting bitten, that too by a stray dog and thereby earn a few bucks.  What is not clear is the fact that, would this compensation be tax-free or not?  It should be, for otherwise people could end up being ‘bitten to glory’.   The Finance Minister would also have to take a call on whether the proposed tax would be a direct one, or an indirect one!!!

 After all, a dog, or for that matter, any animal attacks or bites only when it feels threatened, or is hurt. The bite is then, basically a punishment inflicted by the dog on the offender. However, the NDMC in a ‘welcome gesture of solidarity’ “whether with the dogs, or with those bitten by the dogs is still not clear) has inflicted the punishment on itself.

Whereas till now, stray dogs hounded only passers-by, pedestrians or vehicle owners, the scene could very well be the opposite in the not-so-distant future.  Human beings chasing dogs and pleading, cajoling and challenging them to bite could make a familiar sight on Delhi streets then. 

Thieves, in particular, must have rubbed their hands in anticipation and glee.  After a theft and a little ‘bit(e) of luck’, they could well go laughing all the way to the bank!  They would rather love to see a book on – ‘How to win over stray dogs and get bitten by them’!!

However, my heart goes out to the poor stray dogs.  They would now by outcasts within their own community.  The chasm between ‘pet’ and ‘stray’ dogs would widen further in the wake of the proposed compensation. Pets would now ridicule stray dogs saying, “Look, our bark is more potent than your bite.  You are only compensating these ‘top dogs’ who keep us in chains”.

If one were to comprehend the languages of dogs, I am sure the next time, stray dogs would be barking out instructions to each other.  “Hey cool it guys.  Are you sure you really want to compensate that idiot”?  Or else, “you bite only twice”!!!  The latest heard from the camp of stray dogs was that they are planning to launch a peaceful, yet “biting” non-cooperation movement and chalking out details of a nation-wide strike.